I'm Just Doing My Best

 I'm Just Doing My Best


“I’m just doing my best.” This is a phrase I find myself throwing around when things get 

difficult. Days when I’m struggling to get everything done, when I’m barely hanging on 

between work, household chores, and raising a child. When somebody criticizes my work 

(or as is more often the case, when I get self-critical) I remind myself that I’m just doing

 my best.

I was saying it to myself this morning, somewhere between making my son breakfast, packing his lunch, and making lunch for my wife and I, when I paused and really thought about what I was saying. Just my best? If it’s my best, how can it be just my best? Isn’t my best what I’m shooting for?

It doesn’t always feel like my best though, partly because I tend to be a bit of a perfectionist. My best should be getting it all done, getting it all done right, and getting it all done a little bit better than I did yesterday. What I came to realize, however, is that our best changes from day to day.

What I am really doing is doing my best today. And, that’s something. Some days are harder than others. Some days when I’m getting everybody ready for the day, I still want to be in bed, or sitting in the backyard with a cup of coffee and a book and listening to the birds.

I have to remember to be forgiving with myself- to give myself some grace. It is important to remember that we are dynamic human beings, not robots. “Best” varies for all of us. I think of world-class athletes who set a world record, but then never reach that level of performance ever again. Or, musicians who do their best but maybe only ever create one amazing song or album.

Then again, there are plenty of examples of bands who the public believe peaked with one of their earlier albums, but they continue producing music, perfecting their technique and sound, and produce what they believe to be their best album in their later years. This brings up the point that what I think of as my best may not be what you think of as my best.

Maybe those people will never hit that peak again, but it doesn’t mean they aren’t doing their best. Maybe, some days Usain Bolt’s best is getting out for a jog around the neighborhood. A million things factor into our lives every day, whether it’s stress at work, health issues, or somebody close to us who is struggling with some challenge of their own. Life changes every day.

What I learned today is to be kind to myself, to be understanding- the same way I would be with my son, or my wife, or my friends, or even perfect strangers. I deserve as much love and respect from myself as everybody else does. No longer will I just being doing just my best- I will be proud of myself for showing up every day and doing my best, whatever that looks like that day.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It's Not Them, It's You

Image
  It's Not Them, It's You It seems like there’s no end to it. I suppose there never will be- it’s been happening for thousands of years. “What’s wrong with the world?” “What has gotten into people?” “Why are things so bad?” In reality, things are, in many ways, better than they ever have been for people. Generally speaking, you are safer now than at pretty much any point in history. You are less likely to be the victim of abduction or physical violence. Full-blown wars are less frequent. No, the world is not perfect. Not by a long-shot. And, there are dangers unique to our time: nuclear proliferation, runaway climate change, etc. Day to day life for most of us, however, is better than ever. Yet, people frequently expound on how terrible the world is becoming. Which begs the question: Why? Are these people living in a different reality? The simple answer: Yes, they are. We all are. Our realities are constantly being created and recreated. We each have our own personal lens throu...
Read more

Better to Stumble Forward Than to Stand Still

Image
  Better to Stumble Forward Than to Stand Still My first article took years to write. It’s something I had thought about for a long time. I read books on writing. I watched YouTube videos made my writers. I researched the best things to write about, and the best places to write about them. Where did all that planning and research get me? Nowhere. At the end of it all, I still wasn’t actually writing anything, and therefore, not actually a writer. Maybe I could be called a researcher, or planner, or dreamer, but not a writer. The day I became a writer didn’t come until I was fed up with the way my life was progressing. Looking around, I realized I wasn’t doing the things I really wanted to do. I also realized that nobody was going to come along and say, “Kevin, it’s time to start now.” That was entirely up to me. What was holding me back? This was the question I had to ask myself. There were several answers that came to me: I was afraid of failing. I didn’t feel prepared. I was afra...
Read more

Don't Be Afraid of Your Future

Image
Don't Be Afraid of Your Future  There’s nothing to be scared of….Right? At one of the high schools I work at, they have these blackboards near the entrance to the school that they like to write cutesy little sayings on: “Throw kindness around like confetti” and that sort of thing. Things that sound they came from a Dove Chocolate wrapper. Today’s message was, “Don’t be afraid of your future.” Being the cynic that I occasionally am at the beginning of work, I thought, “What the hell does that even mean? Who, generally, is afraid of their future?” After a moment of reflection, I realized that I was. Shit. I  am . What’s more, I’ve known plenty of people who are, even if they don’t realize it or speak it out loud. Two years ago, I was asked to talk to a 12th grade student that I had known since he was a freshman. I’d watched him grow from a 14-year-old pain in the ass to an 18-year-old, respectful, studious, less frequent pain in the ass. His teacher asked me to talk to him, beca...
Read more